Next month I’m going to move to a new house, so I’m organizing all my things, putting them on boxes and throwing away that kind of things which I know I’m not going to use any more.
Last week I was in the attic separating some books, when I suddenly found my old diary. It has been ages since I last saw it; as I’m always moving from one house to another I thought I had lost it many years ago. I immediately sit down and started to read it. I found funny anecdotes and some others that made me cry, but although this I felt very pleased because I had some minutes to come back to my childhood.
It was funny to read a page where I wrote that I had many problems, too many things to think of in a short period of time, and a big confusion in my mind….I didn’t know that life would be harder than it used to be in that moment.
Having found my diary has brought me back many memories and feelings I have forgotten, but mostly it help me realize that many other things are still the same as they used to be in the past, such as the loneliness I feel when I’m with my parents and my sister, or when I talk to them; or even when I’m with my friends and I feel misunderstood. It has also showed me that the relation I have with my sister has always been the same, and that time doesn’t seem to make it a better one; but I have not changed my personality neither, I’m still a very sensitive, stubborn and boring person.
jueves, 25 de octubre de 2007
domingo, 7 de octubre de 2007
A SAFE PLACE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1cNPzEC_Qk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ss2-wBLA-KQ
When I was 14 years old I fell in love with an older boy; he was 17 and my sister’s classmate. He had almost invited her in a date but before he could ask her out she told his friends not to do that because she had recently broken up with her boyfriend.
I met him in a holiday. One of my friends had invited me to go with her to his house, and her brother ( one of my sister’s classmate too) invited the boy whom I fell in love to go with him. And all started there. We were always talking and having fun, but both of as were too shy to talk about anything else but silly things.
When I came back to my house we always chat and sent e-mails. But suddenly all my sister’s friends started to bother me with him and it seemed that it was the end of all.
We can say that “all” was nothing, because I didn’t know him too much, and we never said anything to each other about what we would feel. But when I saw him at school I could feel a wonderful sensation when he looked at me. Very deep in my heart I know that he felt at list something about me(some of my friend agree with me because, as they say, he used to look at me in a special way, but some other are not).
I have never known what he really felt about me, but now, three years later I’m still thinking of him as my first love, although it may not be corresponded. When I see him or even when I think of him I feel a huge appraisal to him and affection, but not what it used to be: a kind of obsession.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1cNPzEC_Qk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ss2-wBLA-KQ
When I was 14 years old I fell in love with an older boy; he was 17 and my sister’s classmate. He had almost invited her in a date but before he could ask her out she told his friends not to do that because she had recently broken up with her boyfriend.
I met him in a holiday. One of my friends had invited me to go with her to his house, and her brother ( one of my sister’s classmate too) invited the boy whom I fell in love to go with him. And all started there. We were always talking and having fun, but both of as were too shy to talk about anything else but silly things.
When I came back to my house we always chat and sent e-mails. But suddenly all my sister’s friends started to bother me with him and it seemed that it was the end of all.
We can say that “all” was nothing, because I didn’t know him too much, and we never said anything to each other about what we would feel. But when I saw him at school I could feel a wonderful sensation when he looked at me. Very deep in my heart I know that he felt at list something about me(some of my friend agree with me because, as they say, he used to look at me in a special way, but some other are not).
I have never known what he really felt about me, but now, three years later I’m still thinking of him as my first love, although it may not be corresponded. When I see him or even when I think of him I feel a huge appraisal to him and affection, but not what it used to be: a kind of obsession.
MY LITTLE GIRL, MU LITTLE FRIEND
Roxi, a six years old girl, was taking breakfast with her family one day when suddenly she saw a little girl standing next to her mum. Roxi, as she was a very sociable girl, immediately went to her and said hello, without asking herself where did that girl came from.
They quickly became very closed friends although the little girl was not a good talker, and when she did talk, she never said a word about her.(Roxi never knew the little girl’s name).
The months passed and they didn’t stop playing and having fun. The little girl was a good companion; as she didn’t talk too much, Roxi could talk for hours feeling that someone finally really understand her. ( but it didn’t mean that they didn’t fight each other sometimes). These two young girls got on very well and where all day together.
But more or less one year later Roxi started feeling a little jealous because the girl wasn’t with her all the time, and when she finally found her, she was with HER mum. One day she felt very lonely because she had spent three days without seeing the little girl, besides her mother wasn’t there too. “As she had been told”, the mother was in a trip and she would come back soon. But she never appeared in the house again, instead Roxi’s father took her to the hospital because her mother was very ill and she wanted to see her daughter. When they arrived Roxi saw the little girl taking her mother’s hands. They didn’t say a word in that moment and never again. Two days later her mother died and the little girl disappeared for ever.
Roxi never talked about the girl because she had always known that she was a very special girl and that Roxi was the only one in her family that could see her.
10 years later Roxi was told that when she was born she had had a twin but unfortunately she had died during birth. In that moment Roxi realized that the little girl she used to see when she was young, and that accompanied her mother until death was her sister.
Roxi, a six years old girl, was taking breakfast with her family one day when suddenly she saw a little girl standing next to her mum. Roxi, as she was a very sociable girl, immediately went to her and said hello, without asking herself where did that girl came from.
They quickly became very closed friends although the little girl was not a good talker, and when she did talk, she never said a word about her.(Roxi never knew the little girl’s name).
The months passed and they didn’t stop playing and having fun. The little girl was a good companion; as she didn’t talk too much, Roxi could talk for hours feeling that someone finally really understand her. ( but it didn’t mean that they didn’t fight each other sometimes). These two young girls got on very well and where all day together.
But more or less one year later Roxi started feeling a little jealous because the girl wasn’t with her all the time, and when she finally found her, she was with HER mum. One day she felt very lonely because she had spent three days without seeing the little girl, besides her mother wasn’t there too. “As she had been told”, the mother was in a trip and she would come back soon. But she never appeared in the house again, instead Roxi’s father took her to the hospital because her mother was very ill and she wanted to see her daughter. When they arrived Roxi saw the little girl taking her mother’s hands. They didn’t say a word in that moment and never again. Two days later her mother died and the little girl disappeared for ever.
Roxi never talked about the girl because she had always known that she was a very special girl and that Roxi was the only one in her family that could see her.
10 years later Roxi was told that when she was born she had had a twin but unfortunately she had died during birth. In that moment Roxi realized that the little girl she used to see when she was young, and that accompanied her mother until death was her sister.
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